Just in case everyone thinks Parsons Boy only writes deliberately obtuse posts, here is one for self-indulgence!
See, he has harbored a not so secret obsession with white gladiators for men for quite a while. He has sought the opinion of quite a number of people and so far, has had mixed feelings about it. Nevertheless, the obsession grows because he is convinced that they do not in fact exist and he must so be forced to cross dress for the sake of fashion. It would otherwise be fine save for the fact that he believes that men and women share different feet shapes.
Now he is faced with a dilemma. Does he continue his hunt for the perfect pair of man gladiators? Or does he give up and get ballerina flats for men in white lambskin from Prada? Oh dear!